Sunday, September 18, 2016


One of the topics that I am really looking forward to hear is the topic of Repentance. After being inspired by the Talk of Sheikh Yasir Qadhi on Repentance, I would like to write on this topic and share with others. Bismillah.

Being a Muslim does not means that we are free from committing sins. In fact, a human being is prone to commit a sin. Just as our Prophet Muhammad () said in one of his narrations, as narrated by Anas who said:

“All the sons of Adam are sinners…” (Related by At-Tirmidzi and Ibn Majah).

When we commit a sin, some of us will develop a feeling of frustration and defeated. And such feelings will drive us towards sadness and ultimately we become hopeless. We think that our sins are huge that we will be deprived of the Mercy of the One God, Allah. We feel that Shaytaan has already won over us and such humiliation will make us feel even worse.

Sinning is a tool of parting us away from Allah. It can also become a tool to bring us closer to Him. It is a matter of our perception and acceptance. When we let negativity and extreme frustration dwell over us, we are in fact paving a path towards our own destruction.

Frustration over our failure to avoid sin is acceptable. It is in fact what we should be feeling of. With a balance tune, it can be a means of making tawbah. But having an extreme feeling of frustration will turn ourselves into a hopeless state of mind. It will eat up our Iman and will turn us into depression.

If we ever fall into the hole of this, we should always remind ourselves of this beautiful verse from the Qur’an:

“Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful.” Az-Zumar; 53

When we go through each word of the above verse, we can extract an invaluable pearl that can shine our life in this world and ultimately in the hereafter. For me, this verse if full of Rahma and Love. Just read it twice or thrice, and ponder upon it. You will find Allah’s Mercy spreading widely in front of you and you just have to open the door and embark into it. Some scholars said, the widest door you can ever find in Islam is, the door of Repentance. No matter how big our sin is, be it as enormous as the mountain, or even to the sky height, we can always turn to Allah and He will wipe away all of our sins. Just ponder upon the following Hadith Qudsi, where Allah said:

“O son of Adam, as long as you call upon Me and put your hope in Me, I have forgiven you for what you have done and I do not mind. O son of Adam, if your sins were to reach the clouds of the sky and then you would seek My forgiveness, I would forgive you. O son of Adam, if you were to come to Me with sins that are close to filling the earth and then you would meet Me without ascribing any partners with Me, I would certainly bring to you forgiveness close to filling it.”

Subhanallah! Just see how massive Allah’s Mercy is. One of the beautiful names of Allah is Al-Ghafur (الغفور) which can be roughly translated to “The Forgiver and Hider of Faults”. It is the ‘nature’ of Allah to forgive and he loves to forgive. He loves to forgive us as much as the love of traveler upon finding his lost camel. Just as the Prophet’s saying which was narrated by Anas bin Malik:

Allah's Messenger () said, “Allah is more pleased with the repentance of His slave than anyone of you is pleased with finding his camel which he had lost in the desert.” (Sahih Bukhari)

We often repeat the same sins over and over again and it might be that we feel like “ok that’s it. I am not going to change after all”. Hold on my brothers and sisters. Before we dwell ourselves on this thought, just consider the following Hadith Qudsi:

A servant committed a sin and he said: O Allah, forgive my sin! Allah the Exalted said: My servant has committed a sin and he knows he has a Lord who forgives sins and holds him accountable. Then the servant returned to his sin and he said: O Allah, forgive my sin! Allah said: My servant has committed a sin and he knows he has a Lord who forgives sins and holds him accountable. Then the servant returned to his sin and he said: O Allah, forgive my sin! Allah said: My servant has committed a sin and he knows he has a Lord who forgives sins and holds him accountable, so do what you will for I have forgiven you.

Allahuakbar.. We should cry reading this hadith. Just open our eyes and read it again and again. How can a servant of Allah loses his hope in the forgiveness of Allah when Allah has sent down this hadith? How can we give up upon the Mercy of Allah, when we have such powerful hadith within us? Indeed the true loser is the one who deprive themselves from the Mercy and Forgiveness of Allah. Just think about this – when we feel that we are not a good Muslim and we can never be forgiven, we are actually saying that we know Allah better than Allah knows Himself. It’s like we are saying that Allah is incapable of forgiving us. Allahuakbar, what a great slander against Allah?? How can we judge Allah as incapable of forgiving our sins when He said by himself that He is At-Tawwab and Al-Ghaffar? Allah himself declared in Surah Al-Ghafir verse 3 that he is “The Forgiver of sin, Acceptor of repentance,..”

Thus, it is encumbered upon us to seek the forgiveness of Allah day and night. When we are riding our bike, or driving our car, or sitting in a train, moist our tongue with the seeking of Allah’s forgiveness - اَسْتَغْفِرُ اَللّهَ الْعَظِیْمَ (I Seek the forgiveness of Allah). Remember this hadith – “All the sons of Adam are sinners, but the best of sinners are those who repent often.” (Related by At-Tirmidzi and Ibn Majah) So let us be the best of sinners and elevate ourselves closer to Allah, The Forgiver of all sins.

A note to myself. May Allah forgives all of my sins. 

Saturday, September 17, 2016


Throughout the years
He’s been rambling
Wandering unaccompanied
From one orchard to another
Aimlessly eyeing for something
As though he has got the centuries
He was probed
By the folks
When will the two legs discontinuing
Taking the next step of roving
In one of those gardens
As though the elongated journey
Doesn’t tire him
As he striding hastily
Picking one flower
Over the other
But all keep fading
And the smell seems reeking
Leaving his hand impure
And his heart fragmented
Shattering his infinite hope
Of holding the veracious flower
The journey does tire him
To crave a new step
In each moment of time
Seems like
Wishing the snow
To stop falling
In the freezing winter
There's always spring after winter
Day after a long restless night
Light at the end
of every dark tunnel
And a destination to every journey
And as his two legs gridlocked
Seeking for a shelter
At an exquisite orchard
Where beautiful flowers blossoming
And the essences are like jewels
Decorating the air
Pleasing him and those around
And today
As the sun merrily shining the day
and the chirping birds
are flying with a melody
He sent the blessed hands
To reserve the green flower
For a sacred day to come
For him to stop roaming around
And holding the veracious flower
Planting it gracefully 
in a house called Home

"Jise zindagi dhoondh rahi hai
Kya ye woh makaam mera hai
Yahaan chain se bas ruk jaaun
Kyun dil ye mujhe kehta hai"

17 September 2016

Monday, September 12, 2016


It was an awkward meeting
Just like the heavy rains
That fall in the midst
of sweaty summer

Though it was a small table
the distance seems like
We were at the two ends
of the world

And just like a good soldier
I was fully equipped
To stride in the chamber
To shoot and be shot
With queries and answers

But everything vanished
As words miss its vowel
And mind lost its calmness
Heartbeats were gasping
As if I was running
Chasing my own silhouette 
When these two eyeballs
Fall upon the thorny Rose
Fresh and untouchable
As if it was raised 
In a King's orchard
Guarded and shielded

As I was stepping in the Garden
Heart keeps battling the eyes
To behold the Majestic
beauty of the Rose
or lowering my wild gaze

As the Rose is blossoming
And as its petals shining
Wrapping itself with shyness
Leaving the thorns guarding
Its chastity and decency
Just as the Queen's red guards
Faithfully shielding the Rose
And at that very moment
I chose to look away

It was a brief meeting
But carries a lifetime meaning
Leaving the Rose's fragrance
Roaming around the air
Giving me a reason
To craft a new step
Treading to the King's garden
And humbly request for
The Blossoming Rose
To be placed in my Garden
And burgeoning here eternally

Written while in a journey
AidilAdha 2016 | 5.30PM

heart singsonging a lullaby - Yiruma : Spring Time

Wednesday, September 07, 2016

Who is Allah?

We were given an assignment by our teacher. We have to write one page answer to a non-muslim question's on "Who is Allah?". Rather than to let the answer to be buried with him alone, it would be good if I can share my answer here as well! Hopefully it will benefit, Insha-Allah.

As a Muslim, I believe that there is only One entity that creates everything. My life, the trees that grow around me, the cat that walks by my leg, the insects that live deep down in the earth – there must be something that controls and manages all of these and I believe that it is being controls by Allah.

I believe that Allah is the One and only God worthy of being worshipped. I believe that Allah is the Lord of the world. The Sustainer and Keeper of everything that exist. The One who sends all the messengers including the last Prophet, Muhammad SAW to the mankind. It is Him that sends down the Qur’an. The book of Guidance to all mankind – Muslim & Non-Muslim. The Book that has zero contradiction and full of miracles. The Book that lays down the process of formation of a fetus in a woman’s womb in detail. And the same Book that articulates the science of the stars and its orbit and many other miracles of science.

It is illogical to think that a human being can come out with all these stories in 1400 years ago. The only explanation behind this is, Allah. He is the One who reveals the Book to Prophet Muhammad SAW. Thus, I believe that only Allah is capable of doing everything. This may sound bias, but this is what I believe.

For example, who would believe that a tree can grow, die and regrow just like that? What kind of right mind can think that this world is a product of sudden explosion i.e. the Big Bang theory? Instead of it detonates by its own, why is it hard to believe that there is something behind this that control it? That cause the explosion to happen?

And why do I believe that there is only One God? Logically, there cannot be two chairmans in a company nor there can be two prime ministers in a country. If there is such thing, the affairs of the company or the country will be in disaster.

Instead of having two or more gods governing and controlling everything - in which we can perceive that the gods are not powerful enough as they need other gods to help each other, one God is way more realistic and rational as it shows the Almighty being and Supreme level of the only God i.e. Allah SWT.

8.55PM | Work-desk | Azmi & Associates.

Saturday, September 03, 2016


For every move initiated
For every word spoken
For every step crafted
For every breath taken
For every blessing misused
And for everything else that I did
Paving a way of unseen
Diverting from the All-Seeing
Though He’s closer than anything
I keep fashioning a path of Shayateen
Enjoying every bit of sinning
Though the pleasure is transitory
And the consequences are ever-lasting
I did what I did
To gratify my ravening desire
Fueling my burning greediness
Though deep in my soul
I know someone is watching
Keep writing
Uninterruptedly recording
Under the command of the Supreme Being
Every single bit-atomic-scale of deed
And with this consciousness
I keep paving on the wrong trail
Heading towards the hole of Hell
And like every other Muslim
As I am reading passages of the Qur’an
Scanning through verses of Ar-Rahman
I discern the Hell and Jannah
Aware of the Reckoning day
But still..
My own desires
Incessantly dominating His
Laying my Reasoning
Enslaved by my own lust
And still..
 I am eating
Drinking and breathing
Enjoying everything
That He has given me
From the moment of conception
Till this moment
While my fingers're freely moving
typing these words out
As I am breathing effortlessly
It’s just so Irony
That I have been using
God’s Blessings
As Tools of sinning
Disgracing my own self
In front of The Self-Sufficient
Oh Allah!
Forgive me!
Will You?

while my ears are waking
hearing the melody of

Bukit Bintang | 2PM | Sunday